Give Me Your Hand
by Keleficent
Summary: None of his rationalizing was enough to push down the lump in his throat. He couldn't kid himself. His memories, good or bad, made him who he was. When the memories are gone, he will be too. For all intents and purposes, he was going to die.


Ford would have given anything to spare his brother from the fate he was about to suffer. He wished he could go back to his original plan to surrender himself in exchange for his family's safety. But that would have meant the end of the universe, and Bill couldn't be trusted to keep his word. This was the only way to ensure the kids would live.

Ford was looking at him with pity. Stan hated being pitied. But there was no way he could deny he was scared when he was gripping the bars of their cage so hard that he was sure his knuckles were white under Ford's gloves.

He shouldn't have been so nervous. He was just erasing his memories. A good chunk of them weren't even happy. He could always make new memories, right?

None of his rationalizing was enough to push down the lump in his throat. He couldn't kid himself. His memories, good or bad, made him who he was. When the memories are gone, he will be too. For all intents and purposes, he was going to die.

Stan's knees buckled under him. Ford stopped him from hitting the floor. Stan tried to stand back up but his legs were shaking.

"You can do this, Stanley." Ford held firm to keep his terrified brother from collapsing. "You'll do fine."

"Ford…" Stan's dry mouth made it difficult to talk. He swallowed and tried again. "Ford, can you promise me something?"

"Anything."

"Stay in my life. Even if you send me to a home or an asylum or whatever, just let me see you every once in a while. Don't leave me on my own again."

"You'll see me every day for the rest of our lives. When this is all over and you're…" Ford couldn't cry now. He needed to be strong for his brother. Stan was scared enough as it is, and Ford needed to help him stay calm. "I'll take care of you. I'll keep you safe. No matter what happens, I'll be there for you. For whatever that's worth."

"It's worth everything." Stan finally had the strength to stand on his own.

Three months ago, Stan would have jumped at the opportunity to have his mind erased to forget all the horrible mistakes he made, a clean start. Then, Dipper and Mabel came into his life. With their help, Ford came back into his life too. He finally had a family, something to live for. A family he now must die for.

"Is it gonna hurt?" Stan sounded like a child, so fearful and innocent.

"No, Stanley, there won't be any pain." They both knew Ford had no way of knowing what it felt like to be shot with the memory gun. Stan let it reassure him nonetheless.

Ford took Stanley's trembling hand. He was able to steady it and Stan reciprocated with a comfort-seeking squeeze. He couldn't help but appreciate the irony. If he had taken Ford's hand earlier, he wouldn't have to sacrifice himself now. He wished Ford could hold his hand until it was over.

Gigantic footsteps shook the grounds of the Fearamid. Bill was coming back. It was time. Stan nearly crushed Ford's hand. Their fingertips lingered for a moment before they finally broke contact.

"Alright, Ford, time's up. I've got the kids," Bill mocked in a sing-song voice. "I think I'm gonna kill one of them now just for the heck of it."

No, Stan had to stop him.

"Eeeny."

But his panic made the words die in his throat.

"Meeny."

He couldn't do this.

"Miney."

He didn't want to die.

"YOU!"

The symbol in Bill's eye changed from Dipper's pine tree to Mabel's shooting star. He was afraid to die, but if he didn't say anything, Mabel will die instead. Seeing his niece's death sentence being flashed before him made Stan realize how little his own life meant to him next to the lives of the children he loved so dearly.

"Wait! I surrender!" Stan chose to trade his life for theirs. He made peace with his decision. He was ready.

He marched to Bill with his back straight and head held high. That's what Ford would do, and he was supposed to be Ford, wasn't he? He wanted the kids to see him go to his death bravely. Deserved or not, they saw him as a hero, and he will spend his last moments making sure he acted like it.

He took Bill's hand. It was done. His fate was sealed. No going back.

The force of Bill entering Stan's mind was strong enough to knock him around 180 degrees. Ford was already daunted at the idea of having to shoot Stan in the back of his head, but now, he had to stare him in the face. He looked so helpless, resigned.

Ford's hands shook as he aimed the gun. He couldn't bear to watch as he killed his own brother.

All of Bill's monstrosities were sucked back to their own dimension. Everything went back to normal (Gravity Falls normal at least). After thirty years of fighting against Bill, the demon was finally gone for good. But the cost had been too high.

Even as the world reset itself, Ford only had eyes for the figure kneeling in the now-empty field.

His eyes opened dazed and unfocused. He felt like someone took a spoon and scooped out his brain. Where was he? How did he get here? Come to think of it, who was he?

"Oh my gosh! Grunkle Stan, you did it!"

A girl approached him. He didn't recognize her, but she treated him with familiarity. He was a little uncomfortable with how close she was. But she seemed like a nice kid, so he decided to play along. "Oh, uh, hey there…kiddo. What's your name?"

That was apparently the wrong thing to say because her demeanor changed from excitement to distress. "Grunkle Stan?"

"Who are you talking to?" Not him surely.

"Come on. It's me. It's me, Grunkle Stan. Grunkle Stan, it's me!"

The girl was pulled away by a boy and an old man. He hadn't meant to upset her, but he must have done something to make her sad. In fact, all three of them looked sad. Even though he didn't even know who these people were, them being sad made him feel sad too.

"We had to erase his mind in order to defeat Bill. It's all gone. Stan has no idea, but he did it. He saved the world. He saved me." Ford was heartbroken to see his once strong, proud brother looking like a lost child.

"You're our hero, Stanley." Ford finally expressed his gratitude for being saved. He declared Stan a hero. He gave Stan the hug he has longed for since Ford came back. It was everything Stan ever wanted. But it all came too late. Stan was gone, and none of this meant anything to him anymore.

Ford curled his hand around Stan's. He didn't squeeze back.


End file.
